The Hidden Bias That Makes You Criticize Young People

Here’s why your brain defaults to disconnection across generations.

“Kids these days!”

Chances are you’ve heard it, maybe even said it. It's usually followed by a few other classics:

• “Back in my day...”

• “They don’t make 'em like they used to.”

• “They’re glued to their phones.”

• “No one wants to work anymore.”

It’s a greatest hits album of generational gripes: timeless, catchy, and wildly off-key.

The reality? Every generation has been embarrassingly prone to assume the worst about the youngest generation. We hurl accusations, lob sweeping assumptions, and somehow forget that similar complaints were once aimed at us. These laments have echoed through the centuries, from the fall of Rome to the rise of TikTok.

But why? Why do we keep hitting repeat on this cycle of generational judgment?

Psychologists John Protzko (Central Connecticut State University) and Jonathan Schooler (UC Santa Barbara) recently dug into this pattern and unearthed two psychological assumptions that fuel it:

Assumption 1: We’re most critical of others in the areas in which we’re most competent.

If you're highly conscientious, you’re more likely to notice sloppiness in others. If you value hard work, laziness jumps off the page. So when older generations see behaviors that don’t match their own strengths, they interpret them as decline, rather than difference. As we age and gain more and more competencies, it becomes easier and easier to look back and spot all of the incompetencies of the youth.

And when we misread difference as deficiency, we short-circuit connection. These assumptions don’t just distort our perceptions—they distance us from each other.

Disconnection grows not because we don’t care, but because we compare...inaccurately.

Assumption 2: We compare “us now” to “them then” instead of “us then.”

Here’s the trap: Older generations evaluate today’s youth not against their own teenage selves but against their current, wiser selves. That’s like expecting a 16-year-old to balance a mortgage, a marriage, and a mindfulness practice. It’s an apples-to-time-traveled-oranges comparison.

These psychological biases make the “decline” of the younger generation feel obvious—even when the data says otherwise. It’s not a failing of the youth. It’s a failing of our memory.

These flawed assumptions build walls instead of bridges. They cause disconnection between generations that could be learning from—and leaning on—each other.

But here’s the kicker: Recognizing this doesn’t mean Generation Z or Generation Alpha gets a free pass. Every generation has blind spots, growth curves, and cultural quirks. But it does mean we should extend more curiosity than criticism.

Letting go of these flawed assumptions can reframe everything.

• Instead of thinking: “I have to keep control because they’ll mess up.”

• Try thinking: “I have to share control so they can step up.”

That shift—from fear to mentorship, from critique to connection—might just be the legacy worth passing on.

So the next time you catch yourself saying, “Kids these days…,” pause. Reflect. And remember that disconnection isn’t caused by distance—it’s caused by dismissal. Connection begins when we choose understanding over assumption. And, yes, someone once said the same thing about you—probably while shaking their head at your music, your clothes, or your pager.

And you turned out just fine.

As a generations keynote speaker and Gen Z expert, Ryan Jenkins helps companies strengthen multigenerational teams and cultures through human connection. If you’d like help building Connectable teams and cultures, click here.